To Be or Not To Be.......Fat

As some of you already know and some of you are now about to know, I have been working the past few months towards having some type of bariatric surgery (lap-band or gastric bypass) in order to lose at least 100 pounds. Why......because I am too FAT.

After being diagnosed with diabetes three years ago, my weight has fluctuated from a high of 302 to a low of 240. And as any physician worth his or her salt will tell you that losing and gaining lots of weight is not good for you. Here is a photo of me coming in at 302. Notice the wonderful clothing you can wear when you get that big.

So this past spring I had a long conversation with my primary care physician, who happens to be a nurse practitioner, and we started talking about long-term options to keep my blood sugar in check and also address my weight gain and loss. She mentioned that the Veteran's Administration (VA) was performing surgery on veterans to stem the long term effects of being OVERWEIGHT. Yes, that is right, at the height of my weight gain, I was MORBIDLY OBESE. Who would have ever thunk it?

So on 4 April 2008 I started down the path to see if I could qualify for bariatric surgery which included taking several surveys, attending multiple nutrition and goal setting classes, weekly group therapy behavior-modification sessions, an entire battery of mental assessments (six or seven), an evaluation by a psychiatrist, and I had to lose between five and ten percent of my BMI. By the 4th of June I had lost the weight and was referred to the surgical team in Dallas, Texas. My referral is for the 11th of July and that is when I will finally find out if and what kind of surgery I will be having or I may be coming home to sulk and eat an entire cheesecake.

One of the observations I wanted to make about this entire issue is the fact that not a single person that I have talked to over the past three months, except for two of my friends who are medical professionals, believe that I need to have the surgery or need to lose at least 100 pounds.

In the problem solving process, the first step is admitting that you have a problem. I now believe and have come to the realization that I am in fact MORBIDLY OBESE and need to lose a significant amount of weight to ensure that I am alive to see my children have children. But it still surprises me at the reaction I get from people when I tell them that I am thinking about having surgery.

-"No way, you're not fat,"
-"You don't need to lose that much weight,"
-"You have big bones."

I am not sure if people are just trying to be nice or if people just don't see the FAT that is in front of them. I truly believe that as a people in this country we have gotten so fat that I have become the face of the new "normal" person, I'm not fat, just big boned. The bottom line is that my bones structure is not big, I just have a lot of fat on the bones that I have.

What I have learned over the past three months is that I have an eating disorder: I EAT TOO DAMN MUCH! I am an emotional eater who eats when I am happy, sad, depressed, and hungry which means I eat emotionally just about all the time (I probably sneak snacks in my sleep or at least in my dreams cuz I never wake up hungry.) Additionally, I have huge problems with portion control....in lay terms that means my eyes are bigger than my stomach.

So now you have it.....I'm FAT and I have made a decision to NOT BE FAT. I have set some goals and one of those happens to be to continue to lose weight whether I get to have the surgery or not. Reduce my portions (only three ounces of meat at dinner) at meal time. Exercise at least 30 minutes a day at least four days a week. Eat at least two portions of fresh fruits and vegetables each day. Most of all continue to pray that My Father in Heaven will see fit to give me the strength, courage, and the fortitude to meet my ultimate goal: 155 pounds.

As I continue on this journey I will let you know how everything is going.

Much Love and Respect,

Byron Lynn

P.S. I thought about eating eight times while writing this post!!!

Garden of Eden-Week 14

Just wanted to show everyone what a little work, a little water, and a little love will get you.

We have been able to produce enough vegetables from the garden that we are eating fresh vegetables just about every day either with meals or snacks and have plenty left over to give to our friends and family.

We were able to get a few peaches before the birds got to them first, but now I am fighting "peach tree borers" in hopes that they don't kill my peach trees. The pear trees had a few pears, but it does not look like we are going to get any before mature.

Our crops of okra and eggplant seem to be doing quite well since the weather has heated up. We have had many days which have already topped 100 degrees which is early for this time of year in this neck of the woods.

Once Tara comes home we are going to plant another crop of squash and sweet peas since the growing season is so long here. The first group of squash was uprooted due to have winds which lifted the plants up out of the ground and the the sweet peas we had planted previously were in an area of the yard which received too much water.

Can't wait until I can figure out a way to add a few animals to our Garden of Eden. We heard through the grapevine that some people who live up the street have chickens. I've always wanted a few goats, but now sure how I can work around the covenants of the home owners association.

Living to learn, and learning to live,

Byron Lynn

Tara's First College Class

I just had to let everyone know that Tara successfully completed her first college class this past May.

She made a "B" in the class and I almost crying while I write this because I am so very very proud of her (plus I miss her so much right now while she is visiting family in Seattle) and I needed to let everyone know how well she did.

She is on track to take her second math class in the fall and if all goes well, she will be taking college Algebra next spring.

Much Love and Respect,

Byron Lynn

Happy Birthday (I can't do everything on time)

Happy Birthday MOM & GRANDMA!! We Love you!!!

Chuck E Cheese Party

 
 
 
 
We had a BLAST at Chuck E Cheese last weekend for Phoenix's birthday party. He loved the basketball game of course. He just ran around and had the time of his life for three straight hours. Thanks to Uncle Todd, Phoenix had LOTS of tickets to cash in at the end of the night!!

Three years old!!!

Well it has happened....my first born turned three today. Crap where has the time gone. I still can't believe I have two kids. and a three year old?? How is this even possible? Well all I can say is I am one lucky Mommy.

Phoenix was so excited to get his boat toy this morning and he is anxiously looking forward to Chuck E Cheese tonight. We will post pictures of that in the next day or so.

Enough is Enough

Court: Texas wrongly seized sect children
A Texas appeals court ruled Thursday that the state had no right to seize hundreds of children from polygamous sect.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24777095/from/ET/

No one should be able to go in and snatch up everyone’s kids under the guise of an unsubstantiated complaint.

If government officials are allowed to do this to the members of the FLDS sect, then WHO is next: the children members of the church you attend?

For example, if you are LDS, Baptist, or Catholic and someone calls in a complaint that there is abuse of children in your congregation, the government (state) might step in and take all the kid that attend your church or your church’s daycare.

Remember it has been documented that the complaint that let government officials to raid the compound was totally FABRICATED.

I am in no way condoning the behavior of the members of the FLDS sect (e.g., underage marriages, food stamp and Medicaid fraud), but we have to remember that is not why those children were taken away from their parents according to what the State of Texas.

As a parent, I am very concerned how easily the state can use heavy handed tactics to come into your home and dictate how you parent your children.

What are your thoughts on the subject?

Byron Lynn

P.S. This only begins to scratch the surface of this mess. The other day families were given court ordered ‘generic’ plans on what they had to start doing in order to be reunited with their children. Since when did one plan fit’s all apply to raising kids!

Boys will be Boys

Well I have been wanting to take the boys and have a picture done of the two of them. After a horrible day at the picture place on Friday, we tryed it again yesterday. We were sucessful.

Then last night we went on a family walk!! Phoenix was excited to be on a walk and was running and bit the dust. He skinned up both knees, his elbow, and as you can see his head. His head got it the worst of course.

All I could think was.....Thank goodness I got the pictures today!!

They say it's your birthday!!!

Happy Birthday to my sister Brandi!!! I wish you were here (living here, that is) so we could have one eck of a party!! Love you!

Could they be ANY cuter??

Here are a couple recent pictures of my boys. Man I love these kids. Those smiles just make me melt. Thanks Grandpa and Grandma for the outfits!!